Our family was told at the beginning of this journey to transplant that it would be like a roller coaster ride. During the initial evaluation we sat with so many knowledgeable people that shared what other families before us have faced. I was told that it would be a lot of waiting, and they weren’t lying. Waiting for Annabelle to show any sign of improvement, waiting for a glimmer of hope during some of the toughest days, waiting for the miracle of the gift of life to present itself for Annabelle. One thing that I’ve learned during this time period of waiting is that’s where God meets you. Sometimes it feels as if He doesn’t hear my prayers, but I know that’s not true. Other times it feels like He’s building my strength when I have those days where I think, this isn’t so bad…I can do this if Annabelle can. Then there are days where I feel His loving embrace and comfort even when something terrible is going on.

Not only has Annabelle’s journey been a testimony to others, but it’s also been a growing experience for me as her mother. I’ve had several people tell me along the way how strong I am and if it were them in this situation with their child they don’t thing they could do it. Let me encourage you Momma, YES YOU COULD!!! God has put this passion in us for our children that is our super power! There are days you are so tired that you feel like you can’t drag yourself into the bed, but let your child ask you for something or grab you by the hand to show you what they need. You somehow muster up the strength to move half the house around for them. When you wake up and you aren’t feeling well but you know your son or daughter needs you, you find the inner strength to push past your own self and pour out everything you have for them. This situation that we are walking through is no different. Yes there are hard days, but one look in those big beautiful eyes and I know in my heart it’s all worth it. Yes, there are some decisions that we’ve had to make for her future that I wouldn’t wish on anyone to have to make, but one squeeze from her little hand comforts my heart in knowing that I’ve done everything that is in my power to make sure she has the best opportunity at life.

It’s been a while since I’ve posted an update on Annabelle, and that’s because we’ve had so much going on that at times it’s been overwhelming for me to put it all in writing. Over the last few weeks Annabelle has required additional chest tubes. She’s gotten a total of 4 but one of those was due to one of the previous ones coming out. She currently has 3 chest tubes. During the last week of June, we had some of our worst days. We watched as our daughter fought so hard to remain stable. Everytime she would cough, it would cause her to desaturate from the 80’s and 90’s all the way to the 50’s, 40’s, 30’s and one time to the 20’s. I can’t even begin to express how hard it was to watch her fight her way to recover from those scary moments. During those moments it was almost as if someone was sucking the breath out of me. It’s horrifying to see your daughter in that state. Through it all, God has remained faithful. After her last big event, we met with her medical team and decided to place her on a type of support that bypasses her lungs and allows her lungs to rest. This decision has made all the difference! While it was very scary and it comes with high risks, we are praying the benefit will out weight those risks. It allows Annabelle a little more time to wait and remain stable without all the major desaturations. We appreciate all of the prayers, kind words, text messages, cards, and donations that have been made in her honor. We love you all and we can’t wait to see what God has in store! Our sweet Miracle In Motion, Annabelle Rae, we love you little darling!